Larry 6 - Dump 85, Frasi degli oggetti - CONSOLIDATO - Inserito Opzioni

[The Ancient One]

- Frase 1 -
That was unnecessary.



- Frase 2 -
Sometimes two inventory items need to be combined, but this isn't one of those times!



- Frase 3 -
Just think what that rough file would do!



- Frase 4 -
What are you trying to do? Shock it to death?



- Frase 5 -
Perhaps it's too high-fallutin' for mere beer!



- Frase 6 -
It feels exactly like what it is!



- Frase 7 -
Either this is not the nuclear-powered synthetic-voice controlled defractivator, or you mispronounced the secret password!



- Frase 8 -
While you might rub yourself on that, moral standards prevent it!



- Frase 9 -
If you re-wet your now-chilled washcloth, it won't be chilled any more.



- Frase 10 -
You wet the washcloth in the water.



- Frase 11 -
Hey, you can never get a washcloth too wet!



- Frase 12 -
Cavaricchi's employee ID badge has her picture on the front, and a magnetic strip on the back.



- Frase 13 -
Employee ID Badge



- Frase 14 -
The employee ID badge isn't impressed by your other objects!



- Frase 15 -
Rubbing your thumb over Cav's photo makes you realize her picture is only two-dimensional.



- Frase 16 -
One end of the electrical cord has a standard plug on it. The other end is now bare wire. You'd better be careful plugging this thing into an outlet. Those bare wires could deliver quite a charge!



- Frase 17 -
Bare Electrical Cord



- Frase 18 -
You don't need to build a battery charger; they're fully charged already!



- Frase 19 -
You twirl the bare ends of the wire a few more times, making sure the copper conductors are twisted nice and tight.



- Frase 20 -
Wait 'til it's plugged in, Larry!



- Frase 21 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 22 -
This is a mill bastard file.



- Frase 23 -
No, seriously!



- Frase 24 -
Bastard File



- Frase 25 -
Using your file, you carefully remove a slight bit of corrosion from one of the battery's terminals.



- Frase 26 -
Sure, you could file a couple of notches in the belt, but you always assumed that was a metaphor for sexual conquest!



- Frase 27 -
Paper wraps stone; diamond cuts file.



- Frase 28 -
You carefully use your little bastard to round off your one rough fingernail and thus, avoid a visit to the spa's sadistic manicurist.



- Frase 29 -
You could eventually file through the handcuffs, but shouldn't you put them on first?



- Frase 30 -




- Frase 31 -




- Frase 32 -




- Frase 33 -




- Frase 34 -
Sure, this file would easily alter your room key, but then you'd never be able to enter the room again!



- Frase 35 -
Takes one to know one!



- Frase 36 -
Sure, this file would easily alter this key, but then no one would ever be able to enter the diving tower again!



- Frase 37 -
If you file it down, there won't be anything left!



- Frase 38 -
These six, red-hot, D-cell batteries are fully charged and rarin' to go!



- Frase 39 -
6 D-cell Batteries



- Frase 40 -




- Frase 41 -




- Frase 42 -
The beaver needs to be inflated, not powered!



- Frase 43 -




- Frase 44 -
Carefully wetting your fingertips, you touch both the positive and negative terminals of one of the batteries at the same time. You do not die.



- Frase 45 -




- Frase 46 -
There's no battery-powered motor on your beaver.



- Frase 47 -
There's no battery-powered motor on your beaver.



- Frase 48 -
The lamp was made to fueled with whale oil, not electricity!



- Frase 49 -
Yeow!



- Frase 50 -
You ought to give that beaver some air!



- Frase 51 -
Deflated Beaver



- Frase 52 -
Be careful. That file would really be rough on your beaver!



- Frase 53 -




- Frase 54 -
Larry! It's a MALE condom!



- Frase 55 -
I think I'll blow up this beaver.



- Frase 56 -
Whoa, Larry! You don't know whose mouth has been on that beaver!!



- Frase 57 -
You're going to require another source of compressed air!



- Frase 58 -
That's a dog collar; not a beaver collar!



- Frase 59 -
How medieval!



- Frase 60 -
Why would a ritzy resort like La Costa Lotta pass out uninflated flotation devices?



- Frase 61 -
You spend a little time polishing your beaver.



- Frase 62 -
If you did that, you'd have just another beaver in a ball gown!



- Frase 63 -
It's not necessary to lather up your beaver.



- Frase 64 -
Try as you might, you don't have enough air to inflate your new swimming pool float. You'll have to find some other means!



- Frase 65 -
Haven't you learned yet to keep that thing away from strange beavers?



- Frase 66 -
You rub your hand up and down the long-necked bottles trying to decide if you want to drink them, or give them away.



- Frase 67 -
Six Cold Ones



- Frase 68 -
You don't need any help to open these bottles; they have twist-tops!



- Frase 69 -
It's a little late to prove you're old enough to drink beer!



- Frase 70 -
You'd never get the beer to light; its alcohol content is far too low.



- Frase 71 -
Ah. Six cold long necks!



- Frase 72 -
Crying in your beer?



- Frase 73 -
Trying to skip the middle man?



- Frase 74 -
The rubber belt reminds you of an elastic bandage for sumo wrestlers!



- Frase 75 -
Wriggle Belt



- Frase 76 -
The belt doesn't need any manipulation; it's perfect just as it is.



- Frase 77 -




- Frase 78 -
Ready for a couple quick belts?



- Frase 79 -
You could dip the filter in the beer, but then you'd have cellulite-flavored beer... and you know how bad that tastes!



- Frase 80 -
Rubbing a little hand creme on the rubber belt only serves to make it more supple.



- Frase 81 -
Rubbing the belt with lard would only make it slip.



- Frase 82 -
You want to set your rubber belt on fire?



- Frase 83 -
You could wipe off the belt, but that polishing cloth is meant for other things. And that doesn't include polishing glasses!



- Frase 84 -
Rubbing the belt with soap is a good idea... when a belt is squeaking. Which this one is not.



- Frase 85 -
Burgundy's bracelet appears to be solid silver. It must have cost her plenty!



- Frase 86 -
And some man probably spent a lot of money on it, too!



- Frase 87 -
Silver Bracelet



- Frase 88 -
You don't want to risk damaging this expensive silver bracelet.



- Frase 89 -
It's not necessary to engrave the bracelet!



- Frase 90 -
A diamond-studded bracelet would be impressive, but you have neither the time nor the ability to create one here.



- Frase 91 -
You try to slip your hand into the bracelet. It's meant for more dainty arms than yours!



- Frase 92 -
Yes, they ARE both bracelets, of a sort.



- Frase 93 -
Smearing hand creme on the bracelet won't help it fit your fat wrist! Save it for someone petite, dainty, delicate.



- Frase 94 -
Smearing the bracelet with lard would only tarnish its silver surface.



- Frase 95 -
You don't need to test it with the match. It's real!



- Frase 96 -
No, you can't strike the match on the silver bracelet!



- Frase 97 -
Yep. It's a perfect fit. But the orange looks dumb inside the bracelet!



- Frase 98 -
You use the washcloth to gently buff the silver bracelet.



- Frase 99 -
You'd get lost inside there, Larry!



- Frase 100 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 101 -
About the only thing you'd like to do with the brochure is study those pictures of naked women.



- Frase 102 -
Spa Brochure



- Frase 103 -
(Umm. Nice expensive paper.)



- Frase 104 -
(SARCASTICALLY) Good idea. If you burn down La Costa Lotta, you won't NEED to escape!



- Frase 105 -
Hey, how come my room doesn't look like the one in the picture there?



- Frase 106 -
And where are all those fabulous babes? And look: most of them are naked!



- Frase 107 -
Those aren't real women, Larry. They're only photographs of naked women!



- Frase 108 -
You'd better return that thing to the Cellulite Drainage Salon and re-install it!



- Frase 109 -
Clean Cellulite Filter



- Frase 110 -
There's nothing more to do to the filter; it's clean and ready to re-install!



- Frase 111 -
Your cellulite filter is now sparkling clean, thanks to the spa's dishwasher!



- Frase 112 -
"Spartan Brand"



- Frase 113 -
"Size: Extra Small"



- Frase 114 -
Complimentary Condom



- Frase 115 -
Wouldn't that ruin it?



- Frase 116 -
Cute. Beaver. Condom. Ha!



- Frase 117 -
You consider ripping open the package just to confirm its contents, but decide against it.



- Frase 118 -




- Frase 119 -




- Frase 120 -
Yeah, good idea. We could all sit around your glowing campfire and sing songs!



- Frase 121 -
This condom is already lubed!



- Frase 122 -
You've heard of people lighting a match on their zipper, but really!



- Frase 123 -
It's not necessary to rinse off this condom; it hasn't been used!



- Frase 124 -
Now is not the time, nor the place. But play your cards right and your time may come.



- Frase 125 -
Even if you don't!



- Frase 126 -
What possible use could you make of a length of electrical wire?



- Frase 127 -
Electrical Cord



- Frase 128 -
If you're looking for a tool to use on this wire, you already have just what you need.



- Frase 129 -
It's a wire, not a length of pipe.



- Frase 130 -
You carefully strip away approximately two centimeters of insulation from the end of the wire without the 3-pin grounded plug.



- Frase 131 -
One end of this electrical cord has a standard AC plug attached, but the other end is still well-insulated.



- Frase 132 -
It's a wire, not a nut.



- Frase 133 -
Whoops, wrong tool!



- Frase 134 -
The champagne is chilled and ready to be served to two. Let's see, counting you...



- Frase 135 -
Chilled Champagne



- Frase 136 -
You don't need anything else to open the champagne. Just use your hands like everyone else.



- Frase 137 -
Sure, you could open the champagne here, but wouldn't you rather wait until you could share it with someone?



- Frase 138 -
Shablee's champagne is iced down and ready to go.



- Frase 139 -
That's disgusting.



- Frase 140 -
The washcloth is perfect just the way it is.



- Frase 141 -
Chilled Washcloth



- Frase 142 -
You could do that... but it's unnecessary.



- Frase 143 -
It feels so... cool.



- Frase 144 -
It was really clever how you cooled down this washcloth!



- Frase 145 -
A cold washcloth would make you shrivel up even more!



- Frase 146 -
This is the largest diamond you've ever seen...



- Frase 147 -
...outside of a ball park!



- Frase 148 -
Large Diamond



- Frase 149 -
Nothing you possess could harm this diamond... and why would you want to?



- Frase 150 -




- Frase 151 -
You rub the diamond between your fingers. Say, these things really ARE hard!



- Frase 152 -
If you had a loupe you'd be able to judge it more accurately, but for right now you'd call it approximately 2.38 carat, VVS, H-I.



- Frase 153 -
You carefully wipe any fingerprints off the beautiful diamond so it sparkles even more!



- Frase 154 -
You love the feel of metal studs.



- Frase 155 -
Your Dog Collar



- Frase 156 -
You carefully remove the large diamond and discard the stupid dog collar.



- Frase 157 -
Thunderbird may have been sadistic, but at least she has a generous side: your new dog collar came complete with a large diamond!



- Frase 158 -
Filling your whale oil lamp with cellulite just may work.



- Frase 159 -
Filled Lamp



- Frase 160 -
You need to find something burning to light your "whale oil" lamp.



- Frase 161 -




- Frase 162 -




- Frase 163 -
You can't "jump start" the lamp. Try a match.



- Frase 164 -
You stick your finger down into the cellulite-filled lamp and discover it's still completely full.



- Frase 165 -
What a surprise.



- Frase 166 -
(Now how do I get this goo off my finger?)



- Frase 167 -
Good idea! Your burning lamp bears a remarkable resemblance to the universal symbol of learning.



- Frase 168 -
Lighting your "whale oil" lamp with a match is a good idea. But first, shouldn't you light the match?



- Frase 169 -
You find the cellulite-engorged filter revolting.



- Frase 170 -
Cellulite Filter



- Frase 171 -
That's no substitute for a thorough washing with hot soapy water.



- Frase 172 -
You could rinse some of the cellulite off your filter with the beer, but you don't have enough beer to give it a thorough cleansing.



- Frase 173 -




- Frase 174 -
YUCK! I'm not rubbing my hand on THAT!



- Frase 175 -
That won't cut through the cellulite to make the filter clean clear through!



- Frase 176 -
And lose your good impression?



- Frase 177 -
The Cellulite Drainage Salon's filter is totally clogged with a white viscous substance with a sour aroma a little like spoiled seafood.



- Frase 178 -




- Frase 179 -




- Frase 180 -
This is hand soap; it would never cut through this horrible mess. It needs an "industrial strength" cleaning.



- Frase 181 -
It will take more than a simple wipe with a cloth to clean this puppy!



- Frase 182 -
How luxuriant! But, wrong.



- Frase 183 -
Art gave you a large flashlight containing at least 6 D-cells. You presume this baby could easily double as his nightstick.



- Frase 184 -
Big Flashlight



- Frase 185 -
You just took the batteries out of the flashlight! Why put them back in?



- Frase 186 -
You deftly open the flashlight, extract Art's batteries, then close it up again, all without him noticing a thing! Slick move, Larry!



- Frase 187 -
You slyly turn the flashlight on, then off. Nothing happens. You hope Art doesn't notice his flashlight now weighs considerably less than it did when he gave it to you.



- Frase 188 -
Have you considered using the floss on your teeth?



- Frase 189 -
Dental Floss



- Frase 190 -
Beer-flavored dental floss? Not a bad idea.



- Frase 191 -
Flossing your teeth afterwards? A possibility.



- Frase 192 -
You pull a length of dental floss from the container and prepare to work those choppers!



- Frase 193 -
Better not. That might soften it up!



- Frase 194 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 195 -
And afterwards, would you want to put that in your mouth?



- Frase 196 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 197 -
You could make a wick from the dental floss and attach it to the stick of dynamite, then place the dynamite... WHOOPS! Let's just say, "You'd better not!"



- Frase 198 -
What a luxurious place! Complimentary mint-flavored dental floss!



- Frase 199 -
You could tie the orange to the dental floss to make a nasty one-third of a bolos. But since you are morally opposed to violence (especially against you!), you decide against it.



- Frase 200 -
You deftly attach the dental floss to the sunglasses polishing cloth to form...



- Frase 201 -
...a (rather small) European-style swimsuit!



- Frase 202 -
Instead of running your mouth off at the floss, you might try running the floss through your mouth!



- Frase 203 -
You rapidly and thoroughly floss every terry of your terry cloth bath towel.



- Frase 204 -
Man, there must be thousands of those little devils!



- Frase 205 -
While you could fashion a thong bikini bottom by tying the washcloth to the dental floss, by the time the washcloth was thoroughly soaked with water, it would be so heavy the floss couldn't hold it.



- Frase 206 -
(Perhaps a smaller cloth would work?)



- Frase 207 -
Wrong end, Larry!



- Frase 208 -
La Costa Lotta thoughtfully places fresh flowers in every guest's room.



- Frase 209 -
Flower Arrangement



- Frase 210 -
The beer won't make your flowers grow.



- Frase 211 -
She loves me, she loves me not; she loves me, she loves me not; she...



- Frase 212 -
...wait a minute! WHO loves me?



- Frase 213 -
You just can't resist playing with your beaver!



- Frase 214 -
Full Beaver



- Frase 215 -
Don't take the chance; you might "prick" it!



- Frase 216 -
Hmmm. Maybe I could suck the air out of this beaver.



- Frase 217 -
Don't do it, Larry! You don't know whose mouth has been on that beaver!



- Frase 218 -
You're just waiting for some joke about a "full beaver," aren't you?!



- Frase 219 -
Keep your mouth away from that beaver!



- Frase 220 -




- Frase 221 -
The solution to the sunglasses case is in your Hand(s).



- Frase 222 -
Sunglasses Case



- Frase 223 -
You open the sunglasses case.



- Frase 224 -
Hey, nice pair of shades! Perfect for lounging around poolside!



- Frase 225 -
These MUST be deluxe sunglasses; they come complete with their very own cute little white polishing cloth.



- Frase 226 -
You have a deluxe sunglasses case that doesn't appear to be empty. It's hard to tell right now, since it is still closed.



- Frase 227 -
Inside your recently-acquired sunglasses case rests a nice pair of designer sunglasses and a cute little white polishing cloth.



- Frase 228 -
Inside your recently-acquired sunglasses case rests a cute little white polishing cloth.



- Frase 229 -
You carefully put your sunglasses back in their case.



- Frase 230 -
You love the "show biz" smell emanating from Burg's show-stopper gown!



- Frase 231 -
Burgundy's Gown



- Frase 232 -




- Frase 233 -
Burgundy's evening gown is far too small to fit you.



- Frase 234 -
While the gown's sequined surface is certainly rough, the match catches on the sequins and refuses to light.



- Frase 235 -
These handcuffs are made of 99 and 44/100%-pure Taiwanese steel. (It floats!)



- Frase 236 -
Handcuffs



- Frase 237 -




- Frase 238 -
You want to lock yourself up in your own handcuffs? Hardly!



- Frase 239 -




- Frase 240 -
"Pure Al Lowe Vera Hand Lotion"



- Frase 241 -
Complimentary Hand Creme



- Frase 242 -
Opening the hand creme, you rub a little around on the back of your hand. Ahh! That feels soothing to your parched skin.



- Frase 243 -
Don't mess up your good impression. You may need that for reference someday.



- Frase 244 -
Bar of Impressed Soap



- Frase 245 -
You carefully compare the tower key copy you made with the impression of the real tower key you created in the soap. They are a perfect fit!



- Frase 246 -
Now you have a bar of "ImpressED Imported Oat Bran Soap."



- Frase 247 -
Comparing the impression in the bar of soap to that key you filched from the lobby, you notice they are exactly the same size and type; the key has only a few extra bumps of metal here and there. Remove them and they'd be a perfect match!



- Frase 248 -
Your room key has a few areas that are slightly smaller than the tower key's impression.



- Frase 249 -
Because of your cleverness, this once humble unknown room key is now an exact copy of the key to the bungee jumping tower.



- Frase 250 -
Tower Key Copy



- Frase 251 -
The old whale oil lamp's wick is still usable.



- Frase 252 -
(PUNCH LINE) (Which may not be the case with you, Larry!)



- Frase 253 -
Whale Oil Lamp



- Frase 254 -




- Frase 255 -
Intending to check for flammability, you feel the lamp and discover you have a dry wick.



- Frase 256 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 257 -
You try to light the wick of the empty whale oil lamp without success. If you could only fill it with something, it might light.



- Frase 258 -
Lighting the lamp is a good idea, but don't you need to fill it with fuel first?



- Frase 259 -
This water has a high mineral content, but not high enough to burn!



- Frase 260 -
You rub the lamp with the polishing cloth fully expecting Robin Williams to appear.



- Frase 261 -
He doesn't.



- Frase 262 -
Five gallons of lard should come in handy if you're planning to do a lot of baking!



- Frase 263 -
Lard Bucket



- Frase 264 -
The bucket of lard feels very greasy and slick.



- Frase 265 -
This lamp looks like it could burn forever.



- Frase 266 -
Lit Lamp



- Frase 267 -
You consider putting out the lamp to conserve the oil but then notice the level hasn't dropped enough yet to be perceptible, so you decide: "Why bother?"



- Frase 268 -
OUCH! Let's not be masochistic, okay?!



- Frase 269 -
This match is ablaze! Be careful.



- Frase 270 -
Lit Match



- Frase 271 -
Are you trying to start a conflagration?



- Frase 272 -
You coolly moisten your fingers, then extinguish the lit match with your fingertips.



- Frase 273 -
You put out the match with the whale oil lamp. That was dumb.



- Frase 274 -
Leave it alone and it will go out on its own.



- Frase 275 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 276 -
While you could set fire to the packet of toilet seat covers, the resulting conflagration would destroy La Costa Lotta and ruin forever your chances of scoring with that chick in the penthouse.



- Frase 277 -
Whoa! There's a chick in the penthouse?! Where?!



- Frase 278 -
While you could set fire to the roll of toilet paper, the resulting conflagration would destroy La Costa Lotta and ruin forever your chances of scoring with that chick in the penthouse.



- Frase 279 -
Whoa! There's a chick in the penthouse?! Where?!



- Frase 280 -
You extinguish the match with your wet washcloth.



- Frase 281 -
Hey! That's hot!



- Frase 282 -
What are you going to do with a whale oil lamp filled with lubricant?



- Frase 283 -
Lubricant-Filled Lamp



- Frase 284 -




- Frase 285 -
You dump all the lubricant out of your lamp and carefully wipe down the inside. There. All nice and clean again.



- Frase 286 -
But now you have a spot on your shoe!



- Frase 287 -
Unfortunately, you've filled your lamp with an inflammable lubricant.



- Frase 288 -
It's difficult to light anything with an unlit match!



- Frase 289 -
You're close, but this is anal lubricant!



- Frase 290 -
This kitchen match looks like it should light... if properly struck.



- Frase 291 -
Match



- Frase 292 -
You rub the match with your fingernail, but it just won't light. If only you were a real man...



- Frase 293 -
You rub the lamp against the match trying to light it. You fail.



- Frase 294 -
The handcuff's stainless steel surface is much too smooth to light the match.



- Frase 295 -




- Frase 296 -
(SOUND FX FIRST OF MATCH LIGHTING) You did it!



- Frase 297 -
You discard the burned out match before it burns your fingers.



- Frase 298 -
You have no zipper upon which to strike your match! But, if you did, that little sucker would light.



- Frase 299 -
The match, that is!



- Frase 300 -
Who do you know that would love a nice bottle of mineral water?



- Frase 301 -
Bottle of Mineral Water



- Frase 302 -
You consider drinking the mineral water, but you know Gammie is waiting for it back on the table and you just couldn't be so cruel as to deny a dehydrating (among other things) woman a sip of cool water!



- Frase 303 -
You might soak the clogged filter in the mineral water, but there's not nearly enough water to clean up THAT mess!



- Frase 304 -




- Frase 305 -




- Frase 306 -
You were fortunate to find the last remaining fresh orange in the salad bar.



- Frase 307 -
Orange



- Frase 308 -
You consider sucking the juice out of the orange, but decide you were suckered enough just coming to La Costa Lotta!



- Frase 309 -
This orchid is already perfect. Don't mess with it!



- Frase 310 -
Orchid



- Frase 311 -
You haven't seen an orchid since your high school prom...



- Frase 312 -
...when you ended up with your own corsage the night she stood you up!



- Frase 313 -
This pearl is already perfect. Don't mess with it!



- Frase 314 -
Pearl



- Frase 315 -
You wonder if La Costa Lotta has a jeweler who could mount this on one of your gold chains.



- Frase 316 -
You carefully wipe the pearl. It's beautiful.



- Frase 317 -
This cute little swatch of cloth is nearly as small as some of those floss bikinis you've seen on the beach!



- Frase 318 -
Sunglasses Cleaning Cloth



- Frase 319 -




- Frase 320 -




- Frase 321 -




- Frase 322 -




- Frase 323 -
The key you swiped from the lobby looks like all the other hotel keys, but has slightly different bumps. That's what makes the same brand of key fit into all other locks, but only work in one particular lock.



- Frase 324 -
Random Room Key



- Frase 325 -
Good idea. You could file down this key with your file, but what would you use for a pattern?



- Frase 326 -
YES! You carefully file this key with your bastard file, using the "Impressed Soap" for a pattern.



- Frase 327 -
Now you have your very own tower key!



- Frase 328 -
Hey, you! What do you think you're doing with that key! You're not trying to make a copy of my tower key, are you? You'd better not be!



- Frase 329 -
YES! You carefully file this key with your bastard file, using the lifeguard's key as a pattern!



- Frase 330 -
Now you have your very own tower key!



- Frase 331 -
You enjoy cleaning your ear with the key, but now it itches!



- Frase 332 -
(PUNCH LINE) Your ear! Not the key!



- Frase 333 -




- Frase 334 -
Good idea. A guy COULD use a bar of soap to store an impression of a key...



- Frase 335 -
...if that key were really important, and he could only gain control of it for a short time, and it was something he wanted to copy later, and it wasn't a stupid key like this that you carry around at all times anyway!



- Frase 336 -
This is the key to your room. If you stick it in just the right place, it MIGHT do you some good.



- Frase 337 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 338 -
Your Room Key



- Frase 339 -




- Frase 340 -




- Frase 341 -
The high amperage of the spa's Electroshock Exercise Machine has transformed your genuine gold-plated medallion into a mass of molten metal now resembling modern sculpture. You decide to name it "Suffering in Silence."



- Frase 342 -
Modern Sculpture



- Frase 343 -
Your complimentary bar of "Impressive Imported Oat Bran Soap" would be more impressive if it had come in a wrapper.



- Frase 344 -
But for an unwrapped bar of soap, it is impressive!



- Frase 345 -
Impressive Soap



- Frase 346 -
Perhaps you could use this in your bathroom sink when you want to wash your hands.



- Frase 347 -




- Frase 348 -




- Frase 349 -
Hey! You!! What in the hell do you think you're doing with my key?



- Frase 350 -
Damn! He saw you! But it really is a good idea to make an impression of that key. If only there was someplace nearby where Billy Dee couldn't see you do it.



- Frase 351 -
Good idea. That lifeguard will never notice you making an impression of his key in your bar of soap from this height!



- Frase 352 -
Now you know why they call this "Impressive Soap!"



- Frase 353 -
(PUNCH LINE) It's a good thing something around here knows how to leave a good impression.



- Frase 354 -
Genuine "Bar-nets!"



- Frase 355 -
Sunglasses



- Frase 356 -
You buff the lenses until they are clean and shiny. But you wonder...



- Frase 357 -
(What else could I do with a small swatch of cloth?)



- Frase 358 -
You are SO clever! Making a swimsuit out of dental floss! Where did you ever get that idea?



- Frase 359 -
Your Floss Swimsuit



- Frase 360 -
You'd love to change into your swimsuit now, but La Costa Lotta has a strict policy: no swimsuits except by the pool!



- Frase 361 -
If La Costa Lotta was really thoughtful, they would have provided these IN your bathroom, instead of on that maid's cart!



- Frase 362 -
Toilet Seat Covers



- Frase 363 -
The roll of toilet paper is a delicate shade of off-white. It's called "white."



- Frase 364 -
Roll of Toilet Paper



- Frase 365 -
The toilet paper feels soft and "user-friendly!"



- Frase 366 -
White is your favorite towel color.



- Frase 367 -
Well, technically speaking, it's your favorite "absence of all colors," but...



- Frase 368 -
Complimentary Towel



- Frase 369 -
Mmmm. Soft. Fluffy. How does Mrs. Lotta keep her laundry so nice?



- Frase 370 -
The key to the diving tower looks just about like every other key in the spa.



- Frase 371 -
Bungee Tower Key



- Frase 372 -




- Frase 373 -
As you fondle the key, you can feel a sharpened edge where it was recently cut from a blank.



- Frase 374 -




- Frase 375 -




- Frase 376 -
La Costa Lotta's washcloths are soft and fluffy... not at all like yours back home!



- Frase 377 -
Complimentary Washcloth



- Frase 378 -
Ah, there's nothing like an old-fashioned beer-soaked washcloth.



- Frase 379 -




- Frase 380 -
Now it's not only wet, but it's also warm!



- Frase 381 -
Your washcloth is soaked in nice, fresh, room temperature water.



- Frase 382 -
Wet Washcloth



- Frase 383 -
Your washcloth is room temperature and smells of diluted beer and label glue!



- Frase 384 -
Your washcloth is room temperature and smells of chlorine and wet towels.



- Frase 385 -
Your washcloth is room temperature and smells of salt water.



- Frase 386 -
Your washcloth is room temperature and smells of urine!



- Frase 387 -
Your washcloth is room temperature and smells of chlorine and sunscreen.



- Frase 388 -
Your washcloth is room temperature and smells of athlete's foot medicine!



- Frase 389 -
Your washcloth is soaked in room temperature, brown, yucky water!



- Frase 390 -
Your washcloth is soaked in room temperature water that smells like crap!



- Frase 391 -
What are you trying to do? Rinse that thing off?



- Frase 392 -
(These are the words of wisdom I learned from Merrily. They're very special. I'm not about to say them out loud!)



- Frase 393 -
Words of Wisdom



- Frase 394 -
What makes you think I'd repeat the words of wisdom out loud?



- Frase 395 -
This wrench is adjustable to fit nuts up to 1.5 inches across.



- Frase 396 -
(You have nothing to worry about!)



- Frase 397 -
Adjustable Wrench



- Frase 398 -
You twirl the wrench's adjuster a little just to make sure it still works.



- Frase 399 -
The ice in the bucket has all melted, leaving you with a bottle of fine, lukewarm champagne.



- Frase 400 -
Warm Champagne



- Frase 401 -
Don't open the champagne now, Larry. Wouldn't you rather save it for a special occasion?

[The Ancient One]

Prese altre 50 circa.

- Frase 301 -
Bottle of Mineral Water



- Frase 302 -
You consider drinking the mineral water, but you know Gammie is waiting for it back on the table and you just couldn't be so cruel as to deny a dehydrating (among other things) woman a sip of cool water!



- Frase 303 -
You might soak the clogged filter in the mineral water, but there's not nearly enough water to clean up THAT mess!



- Frase 304 -




- Frase 305 -




- Frase 306 -
You were fortunate to find the last remaining fresh orange in the salad bar.



- Frase 307 -
Orange



- Frase 308 -
You consider sucking the juice out of the orange, but decide you were suckered enough just coming to La Costa Lotta!



- Frase 309 -
This orchid is already perfect. Don't mess with it!



- Frase 310 -
Orchid



- Frase 311 -
You haven't seen an orchid since your high school prom...



- Frase 312 -
...when you ended up with your own corsage the night she stood you up!



- Frase 313 -
This pearl is already perfect. Don't mess with it!



- Frase 314 -
Pearl



- Frase 315 -
You wonder if La Costa Lotta has a jeweler who could mount this on one of your gold chains.



- Frase 316 -
You carefully wipe the pearl. It's beautiful.



- Frase 317 -
This cute little swatch of cloth is nearly as small as some of those floss bikinis you've seen on the beach!



- Frase 318 -
Sunglasses Cleaning Cloth



- Frase 319 -




- Frase 320 -




- Frase 321 -




- Frase 322 -




- Frase 323 -
The key you swiped from the lobby looks like all the other hotel keys, but has slightly different bumps. That's what makes the same brand of key fit into all other locks, but only work in one particular lock.



- Frase 324 -
Random Room Key



- Frase 325 -
Good idea. You could file down this key with your file, but what would you use for a pattern?



- Frase 326 -
YES! You carefully file this key with your bastard file, using the "Impressed Soap" for a pattern.



- Frase 327 -
Now you have your very own tower key!



- Frase 328 -
Hey, you! What do you think you're doing with that key! You're not trying to make a copy of my tower key, are you? You'd better not be!



- Frase 329 -
YES! You carefully file this key with your bastard file, using the lifeguard's key as a pattern!



- Frase 330 -
Now you have your very own tower key!



- Frase 331 -
You enjoy cleaning your ear with the key, but now it itches!



- Frase 332 -
(PUNCH LINE) Your ear! Not the key!



- Frase 333 -




- Frase 334 -
Good idea. A guy COULD use a bar of soap to store an impression of a key...



- Frase 335 -
...if that key were really important, and he could only gain control of it for a short time, and it was something he wanted to copy later, and it wasn't a stupid key like this that you carry around at all times anyway!



- Frase 336 -
This is the key to your room. If you stick it in just the right place, it MIGHT do you some good.



- Frase 337 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 338 -
Your Room Key



- Frase 339 -




- Frase 340 -




- Frase 341 -
The high amperage of the spa's Electroshock Exercise Machine has transformed your genuine gold-plated medallion into a mass of molten metal now resembling modern sculpture. You decide to name it "Suffering in Silence."



- Frase 342 -
Modern Sculpture



- Frase 343 -
Your complimentary bar of "Impressive Imported Oat Bran Soap" would be more impressive if it had come in a wrapper.



- Frase 344 -
But for an unwrapped bar of soap, it is impressive!



- Frase 345 -
Impressive Soap



- Frase 346 -
Perhaps you could use this in your bathroom sink when you want to wash your hands.



- Frase 347 -




- Frase 348 -

[The Ancient One]

- Frase 301 -
Bottle of Mineral Water
Bottiglia di Acqua Minerale


- Frase 302 -
You consider drinking the mineral water, but you know Gammie is waiting for it back on the table and you just couldn't be so cruel as to deny a dehydrating (among other things) woman a sip of cool water!
Vorresti bere l'acqua minerale, ma sai bene che Gammie, sul tavolo, la sta attendendo e tu non puoi certo essere così crudele da negare un sorso d'acqua fresca ad una donna che (fra le altre cose) si sta disidratando!



- Frase 303 -
You might soak the clogged filter in the mineral water, but there's not nearly enough water to clean up THAT mess!
Potresti anche immergere il filtro intasato nell'acqua minerale, ma non ce n'è abbastanza per ripulire TUTTO quello schifo!



- Frase 306 -
You were fortunate to find the last remaining fresh orange in the salad bar.
Sei stato fortunato a trovare l'unica arancia restante nel bancone del buffet.


- Frase 307 -
Orange
Arancia


- Frase 308 -
You consider sucking the juice out of the orange, but decide you were suckered enough just coming to La Costa Lotta!
Valuti l'idea di ciucciare il succo dell'arancio, ma ti rendi conto di essere già abbastanza "ciuccio" per conto tuo da essere venuto qui a La Costa Cara!
Ho reso con questo termine.
Non so se è solo dialettale. Da noi si capirebbe. Altre idee?

- Frase 309 -
This orchid is already perfect. Don't mess with it!
Questa orchidea è già perfetta. Non rovinarla!


- Frase 310 -
Orchid
Orchidea


- Frase 311 -
You haven't seen an orchid since your high school prom...
Non vedevi un'orchidea dal ballo di fine anno...


- Frase 312 -
...when you ended up with your own corsage the night she stood you up!
... quando finisti la sera con l'unica compagnia del tuo mazzolino, la notte che lei ti dette buca!


- Frase 313 -
This pearl is already perfect. Don't mess with it!
Questa perla è già perfetta. Non rovinarla!


- Frase 314 -
Pearl
Perla


- Frase 315 -
You wonder if La Costa Lotta has a jeweler who could mount this on one of your gold chains.
Ti chiede se a La Costa Cara ci sia un orafo che possa incastonartela in una delle tue collane d'oro.


- Frase 316 -
You carefully wipe the pearl. It's beautiful.
Lucidi con cura la perla. E' bellissima.


- Frase 317 -
This cute little swatch of cloth is nearly as small as some of those floss bikinis you've seen on the beach!
Questo grazioso piccolo panno è quasi piccolo come alcuni dei costumi a filo che si vedono in spiaggia.
Da ccordinare con una simile nel dump della piscina.

- Frase 318 -
Sunglasses Cleaning Cloth
Panno Per Pulire Gli Occhiali


- Frase 323 -
The key you swiped from the lobby looks like all the other hotel keys, but has slightly different bumps. That's what makes the same brand of key fit into all other locks, but only work in one particular lock.
La chiave che hai sgraffignato alla reception è simile alle altre chiavi dell'albergo, ma con una dentellatura leggermente diversa. E' questo il segreto che fa sì che tutte le chiavi della stessa marca entrino in tutte le altre serrature, ma ne aprano solo una.


- Frase 324 -
Random Room Key
Chiave Di Una Camera A Caso


- Frase 325 -
Good idea. You could file down this key with your file, but what would you use for a pattern?
Bell'idea. Potresti limare questa chiave con la tua lima, ma cosa vorresti usare come schema?
Qualche idea migliore per rendere pattern?
In pratica poi lima la chiave sulla base del calco che ha fatto con la saponetta.

- Frase 326 -
YES! You carefully file this key with your bastard file, using the "Impressed Soap" for a pattern.
SI'! Con grande cura limi questa chiave con la tua lima bastarda, usa la tua "Saponetta Impressa" come schema.
pattern da coordinare con la 325.
Impressed da coordinare (vedi mio post precedente)


- Frase 327 -
Now you have your very own tower key!
Adesso hai la tua personale chiave della torre!



Finisco dopo pranzo (forse)!

- Frase 328 -
Hey, you! What do you think you're doing with that key! You're not trying to make a copy of my tower key, are you? You'd better not be!



- Frase 329 -
YES! You carefully file this key with your bastard file, using the lifeguard's key as a pattern!



- Frase 330 -
Now you have your very own tower key!



- Frase 331 -
You enjoy cleaning your ear with the key, but now it itches!



- Frase 332 -
(PUNCH LINE) Your ear! Not the key!



- Frase 333 -




- Frase 334 -
Good idea. A guy COULD use a bar of soap to store an impression of a key...



- Frase 335 -
...if that key were really important, and he could only gain control of it for a short time, and it was something he wanted to copy later, and it wasn't a stupid key like this that you carry around at all times anyway!



- Frase 336 -
This is the key to your room. If you stick it in just the right place, it MIGHT do you some good.



- Frase 337 -
(I wish I had a dollar for every time I've heard THAT!)



- Frase 338 -
Your Room Key



- Frase 339 -




- Frase 340 -




- Frase 341 -
The high amperage of the spa's Electroshock Exercise Machine has transformed your genuine gold-plated medallion into a mass of molten metal now resembling modern sculpture. You decide to name it "Suffering in Silence."



- Frase 342 -
Modern Sculpture



- Frase 343 -
Your complimentary bar of "Impressive Imported Oat Bran Soap" would be more impressive if it had come in a wrapper.



- Frase 344 -
But for an unwrapped bar of soap, it is impressive!



- Frase 345 -
Impressive Soap



- Frase 346 -
Perhaps you could use this in your bathroom sink when you want to wash your hands.



- Frase 347 -




- Frase 348 -